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Sh*t My Husband Says | On A Boat Edition

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My husband is slowly learning he is no longer on a ship. It’s shore commands for him, for the rest of his career. I like it: no more duty, no more jet fuel smell in the car and on his uniforms, no more long and unpredictable hours.

He doesn’t like it so much. There is less structure when you are dealing with both Naval and civilian personnel. There is less cussing. There is less getting shit done right, the first time. He is making his way as department head and learning who his “shipmates” are. Oh, what’s that? Yes, my husband refers to all in the Navy as his “shipmates”. If someone mumbles he says “what’s that, Shipmate?” If someone needs a haircut he’ll say something like “looking like a hippie there, Shipmate!”

Well, he’s making friends and already helping out by giving people call signs. Yep- call signs. One of the guys at the hospital is being promoted today. Hubs got to work to discover an “urgent” e-mail. The poor guy is getting ready for the ceremony [which will be sometime around lunch, I think] and realized he bought female shoulder boards. Yeah, great job, Shipmate. It’s 6:30 when I get the call to remove Hubs’ shoulder boards from his whites and stand by at the front door. Yep, Hubs says stuff like “stand by” too.

He informs me maybe the guys call sign should be “Boards”. I tell him it should be “Lady Boards”. Hubs says people might find it offensive, but it’s true and funny.

Does your husband have strange military terms he uses on a regular, at home basis? Is it still the deployment talking? I’ll be “standing by” for your stories of camaraderie in the land of military wives!

About Elizabeth

Paleo wife on 150lb weightloss journey documenting life, marriage, health & military move to Okinawa! Tough Mudder (Nov '12) and Stella & Dot Stylist!

7 responses »

  1. HA, love this! My husband is a FAO who studies Arabic at the DLI here in Monterey. He now not only uses the occasional Navy term and lots of curse words, but also Arabic!!

  2. They all say shipmate! I think it must be official terminology — a lot of my friends here say it, even the ones who are at shore commands and have only ever been at shore commands. It also weirds me out when they ask permission to come aboard… to a building? I pointed out ever so helpfully to Chris that he was going into a building and not a ship, but he just rolled his eyes at me… haha. He only says stuff like that at work though. The only Navy terminology that has entered our house is from me when I want him to sweep the kitchen and call for sweepers 🙂

  3. Marines always talk like that and after 17 years I do as well…I “hit the rack” when I am going to bed…I say “stand by” when asking someone on the phone to be put on hold or if someone is waiting for something. And our son grew up hearing “at ease” instead of stop or stand still…I guess after all these years of being around Marines and married to one it is like picking up an accent. My favorite one by far is when someone is doing something stupid …he is definitely “wearing clown shoes”

  4. Lady Boards. Bwahahahahaha. Perfect.

    My husband is Army. He regularly calls people “troop” or “soldier.” When it’s safe to cross the street he announces “Breach!” Pedestrians are “dismounts.”

  5. haha love it!

    Mike is pretty good about not using military jargon. Whenever he throws the stray acronym around, I’m like “huh?”.

  6. You know, I honestly don’t think I can think of any of the jargon standing out to me just because -I’m- so used to it now that I’m not sure I notice anymore.

    BUT— our first deployment is coming up and I will issue you a full report when he returns and see if anything raises an eyebrow!! Ha


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